Five minutes into CRANK, it was so blatantly clear that I was dealing with a wannabe DOMINO clone that I began to wonder how I could write this review. I mean, how could I express how bored I was with most of CRANK, but defend DOMINO, my favourite film of the last decade? Everything was so similar, from the over-saturated visual style to the zany side characters to the attempt to make the story seem like a half-remembered nightmare through a cracked mirror of regret, that I felt helpless to like one and not the other.
To conquer these problems, I came up with the following proof:
Using the universally-accepted equation that:
we might then surmise that:
but a more accurate surmise would be that:
Observation: The film DOMINO has several scenes with nunchucks.
Observation Two: The film CRANK has zero scenes with nunchucks.
Conclusion: I drew it:
